Is dis cal sadness

10a.m i cleaning de house.. i sundenly think of my sis wedding... after think it i was smiling... but awhile more i start crying feel de pain de sadness in my heart.. is dis cal sadness i cry sundenly witout de reason y.... i feel sad very sad but wat i sad about it i dunno... is dis sumthing goin happen... feel uncomfortable now... feel like goin 2 fight like a war.... like everyone is crying.... i hope dis not goin 2 b true... by de way i saw my frenz today (mei peng) i feel happy but i cant show de feeling i miss them... i feel like day by day my feeling all gone.. no is not feeling my feeling still have is inner feeling not outter feeling... even i feel happy i cant show de happy on my face... nows a day i keep showing a fake smile not even can show de true of me... i feel my self goin into darkness... i feel sorry to my self... i realize tat i'm not hui theng anymmore is another person controling me already... ooo i grow bigger tat make me bcome like dis... do my frenz all think i'm changing o not....

first time in my life

first time i b serious wit matured mind in myself..... i'm sorry if i hurt ppl... but i do it is for my own sister happiness....hope de day come nvr happen unfortu thingss.....

Yesterday 27 dec 09' i had a bad day n i guess today 28 my bday will b a sad day.. bcoz my family prob....
already 1a.m ler oni my sis give me a birthday cal.. even my father frgt bout me... wat i hope tmr can have a dinner wit he... although no cake 2 make a wish.. but i make a wish in my heart hope tat my mum n dad happy always.. my sis n bro wanna marry de hope they have a wonderfull family... n wish them healty always...

xestine here ^^(its me)

 
My Family

new age.... new life o ntg change

after tonite... its goin to b fun o not i still dunno... but wat i always hope is a new life o new day for me... i wish i cloud smile as long i can... o mayb de day is ntg special... i nvr gt anything special when de day comes...

first time have a blog

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